If my sister's in trouble so am I.
A baby brother's note of gratitude.
I am a lot of different things. A few months ago during a work retreat, we were asked to list the different identities we bring to the proverbial table. I wrote down things like “a reader, a gay, a horseman, a Mexican.” When asked to share out one of our identities, I decided on one identity that I think describes a lot of my personality development.
I am a younger brother.
Growing up with two older sisters felt like having three moms sometimes, especially since my actual mom is a Mexican woman who was raising three Americans. My sisters were the ones that taught me how navigate the world and informed my perspective.
Although we are our own people, I think all three of us fit the “oldest, middle, youngest” stereotypes pretty accurately. When I told my sisters about creating this newsletter, I asked them if they would one day like to be featured as my favorite people.
Esperanza, the oldest, enthusiastically said yes. Alex, the middle, said no.
As I get older, I realize more and more how lucky I am to have siblings I actually enjoy and am friends with. We speak on the phone a few times a day and they are always the first people I call when I have news.
I am so grateful to have them as my supporters. Their love and support has sustained me through the hardest parts of my life and I credit them as the reason why I’m still here.
When I was on the BART platform a decade ago, deciding whether or not I should jump, the thought “your sisters would be really sad” is what kept my feet planted.
I hope it’s clear how much I love them.
I love them, despite the fact that they once shoved me in a closet with a carrot and told me to eat it so I could see in the dark and they didn’t let me out until I had thrown up on myself.
I love them, despite the fact they once sat on me in a front yard and didn’t let me get up until I had eaten grass.
I love them them, despite the fact they almost made me eat lard once by telling me it was melted vanilla ice cream.
I love them because they helped me become the person I am today. I would do anything for them and I know they would do the same. To quote the music video that was on the Sister Act VHS tape, “if my sister’s in trouble so am I.”
April Book Reviews I
Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention--And How to Think Deeply Again: 4 stars
What I liked about this book: This book was very affirming. I have been trying to kick my own phone addiction and this book helped me understand why it’s been so difficult. It has made me more present recently and I think everyone should read it.
Who I’d recommend this book to: everyone who is alive and has a cell phone in 2024.
Medium of the book: Audiobook from the Oakland Public Library (great British narration) listened to at 1.25x speed.
Judging a book by its cover: It was fine. It didn’t move me at all, good or bad.
Open Throat: 2 stars
What I liked about this book: It is so rare for me to review a book I hated because I almost never finish reading it. But this audiobook was less than 2 hours long so I gave it a shot on laundry day. I liked the concept and promise of this book. HATED EVERYTHING ELSE.
Who I’d recommend this book to: no one.
Medium of the book: Audiobook from the San Diego County Library
Judging a book by its cover: It piqued my interest and is one of the reasons I picked it out at a bookstore a few weeks ago.
Martyr!: 5 stars
What I liked about this book: Incredible book but it now one of my all-time favorites. The author is a poet and this is his first novel. I am anxious for more people to read it so I can discuss the ending with them. I learned so much about the Iranian-American experience and Iranian history.
The writing itself was gorgeous and stopped me in my tracks a few times. I was so engrossed in it that I grabbed a highlighter and started highlighting my favorite sentences. I never mark up the books I read so but this one inspired me.
Who I’d recommend this book to: anyone who has ever thought about what their legacy would be; addicts and people who know them; anyone who would like to read a book with beautiful prose.
Medium of the book: Used hardcover from Pegasus Books. It’s a signed copy and it was such a fantastic find.
Judging a book by its cover: I have noticed a lot of my favorite books are yellow and this one fits. I love the cover art and design so much.
My favorite people’s favorite things.
I love the Celebrity Shopping lists on The Strategist. Here are some of my favorite people’s favorite things.
Of course Esperanza is this month’s person. She created in me in her image and was my first fag-hag. My comedic sensibilities were developed on the floor of her bedroom on Saturday nights when we would watch SNL together.
I am so glad you all finally get to meet her. So without further ado, here are Esperanza’s favorite things as told by her:
Chili Oil: I always used to add salsa or hot sauce on my eggs, but now I can’t imagine eating my eggs without this chili oil. It might have MSG in it, but I never cared enough to google it because I will never stop eating it so why bother?
A humidor: I bought a humidor for my husband as a gift years ago because he used to smoke cigars with his whiskey. Now, due to its shelving system, it creates a false bottom that is used to hide our edibles from the kids.
Iron Pills: After years of being anemic, I was recommended to take iron supplements. One of the results I noticed is that I had less gray hair growing in. Ew, yuck - mortality! Use this as a reminder to book your next physical with doctor and ask if you could check your iron levels.
Hair Jewelry Rings Hair: Kids with long hair have plenty of scrunchies but consider this purchase if we want to gift fun hair flair. They’re low cost, easy to use, and something you can share with your kid.
Potty Training Bullseye Decal: Potty training is the worst and will make you desperate enough to buy the tackiest shit if there is a chance it will help. This decal encourages good aim, is easy to remove, and will make your houseguests laugh while they judge your parenting choices.
Wood Whittling Kit: This kit comes with gloves to help prevent injury, and encourages kids to learn how to handle a knife. It gives the kid something to focus on other than a phone with the threat of slicing a tendon. It builds character!
Calirado Kid gloves: I like to support content creators that I follow, and this guy is not only funny and creative, he’s a great dad and husband. And I should know since we’ve been married for 15 years. Joe started his own YouTube channel during the beginning of the pandemic and it’s been inspiring to see your partner achieve great things…like his own pair of gloves!
Flea Markets: No, not antique fairs. Check out your local flea market to get access to the best fresh fruit and counterfeit Sanrio merch you can get your hands on. I take my kids, have them practice their Spanish while purchasing their own Mexican candy, and take in all the fun items that just happened to fall off trucks that week.