As of late
What a year this month has been, am I right?
I haven’t been in the writing mood because *gestures at everything*. The vibes in the world have been bad, but for the sake of this newsletter we’ll just focus on the good that we still have.
I’ve officially been back in Northern California for two months, but it still feels strange to see my blue dot on Google Maps up here. Whenever I pull up directions for Costco it still defaults to the Mission Valley location.
It’s been a major change, but it’s been a fun adventure so far. I love that I never drive anymore. I am BART’s biggest fan (I already pre-ordered a BART holiday sweater) and I’ve started to recognize my fellow commuters. We took it to see Shucked a few weeks ago and I felt such glee being a “big city girl,” a phrase my sister Alex called me once when I first moved to the Bay years ago.
Every time I ride BART I feel like I’m living in the Mary Tyler Moore theme song.
I’ve been calling this era of my life my Bay Area reboot. The original era ended sooner than planned so I’m glad that life has presented another opportunity to explore the place I love.
Come visit soon, friends. I’d love to throw a beret in the air with you.
August & September (so far) Book Reviews
Homeseeking: 5 stars (Nominee for the Golden Martini for Book of the Year)
What I liked about this book: It turns out my favorite genre of book is a historical fiction novel set in East Asia. I loved the way this story unfolded and how it would jump around different years. This book was both romantic and pragmatic, which I enjoyed. Multiple things can be true all at once and this book captured how messy that truth can be.
Who I’d recommend this book to: anyone that liked Real Americans by Rachel Khong; anyone who is unfamiliar with the history of Shanghai or Hong Kong; anyone who likes decades-long romantic sagas; anyone who has ever wondered if they made the right choice.
Medium of the book: Hardcover
Judging a book by its cover: I like it. The blue is calming and eventually all the objects on the cover made sense.
Everything is Tuberculosis: 3.5 stars
What I liked about this book: I knew almost nothing about tuberculosis before this book and I feel like a better global citizen after having read this. I enjoyed the fun anecdotes (we wouldn’t have the cowboy hat without tuberculosis), but I do think they were outweighed by how devastating tuberculosis has been and continues to be in parts of the world.
PSA: I did have recurring tuberculosis nightmares while reading this book. This is not out of the ordinary, though. When I worked in necropsy I had recurring nightmares that I contracted a zoonotic disease. It is for the best I did not pursue a career in the health field.
Who I’d recommend this book to: anyone who doesn’t know much about tuberculosis; people interested in public health.
Medium of the book: audiobook, listened to at 1.25x speed.
Judging a book by its cover: Fine. It looks like an orange on the cover.
Good Dirt: 3 stars
What I liked about this book: This book was fine. I loved the author’s previous book, Black Cake, but this book didn’t hit for me. It had all the ingredients for a book I would enjoy but it just wasn’t for me.
Who I’d recommend this book to: anyone who enjoyed Black Cake; anyone who needs an easy-listening audiobook.
Medium of the book: audiobook
Judging a book by its cover: Love.
Disco Witches of Fire Island: 4 stars
What I liked about this book: Collin recommended this book to me and he had the best description of it: “It’s like if there was a Hallmark movie set during the AIDS crisis.”
I loved how campy and kind this book was while still being horny. This book was also written in a way that sucks you in right away and is able to hold your attention throughout the whole story.
Who I’d recommend this book to: anyone who likes Hallmark movies; anyone who has ever been to Fire Island or any other gay destination; anyone who has ever felt like they’ve levitated on a dance floor.
Medium of the book: Paperback
Judging a book by its cover: BEST COVER OF THE YEAR BY FAR. It’s the reason the book called out to Collin at the bookstore in Guerneville.
My Good Side: 1 star
What I liked about this book: Not much! To be honest, listening to this book scratched the unkind itch in my brain that loves to be a judgey bitch sometimes. I did love that her doctor is named Dr. Banooni, pronounced just like Martini’s nickname. Imagining our cat as Scheana’s OB-GYN has made me laugh for weeks.
Who I’d recommend this book to: anyone who has watched Vanderpump Rules.
Medium of the book: Audiobook
Judging a book by its cover: This is exactly the kind of cover I expect from a reality star’s memoir.
Atmosphere: 5 stars (Nominee for the Golden Martini for Book of the Year)
What I liked about this book: EVERYTHING! This book was amazing. It made me want to learn about the stars. Lesbian astronauts in the 1980s? Yes, please! I inhaled this book in 3 days.
Who I’d recommend this book to: anyone who has ever looked up in the night sky and felt a sense of awe.
Medium of the book: E-book
Judging a book by its cover: Wonderful. I want a pair of aviators now.
Actress of a Certain Age: 5 stars (Nominee for the Golden Martini for Book of the Year)
What I liked about this book: I have been a Jeff Hiller stan for years and I’m so happy he’s finally having his time in the sun. This book was as warm and funny as he is and it was a delight to finish this the day he won an Emmy.
Who I’d recommend this book to: any gay guy who has ever been blocked after sending a face pic on Grindr; anyone who has ever worried that life has passed them by; anyone queer who grew up in a religious household.
Medium of the book: Audiobook (highly recommended)
Judging a book by its cover: Glamorous. I want a photo like this of myself.
Katabasis: 4.5 stars
What I liked about this book: This book broke my brain and I liked it. It’s been a long time since I’ve been so challenged by a book and it felt good to stretch my brain again like I was in college. There was a lot of calculus, philosophy, and logic in here and I had to reread several passages before they made sense.
There was one part that gave me a major ick and I almost stopped reading it right then, but I’m glad I persevered.
Who I’d recommend this book to: anyone who has ever gone to graduate school; anyone who is a bit too goal-oriented and needs to be reminded to unclench; anyone who has read Dante’s Inferno; anyone who has ever agreed with the phrase, “hell is other people.”
Medium of the book: hardcover
Judging a book by its cover: Gorgeous. I love this cover, but I love the pages on the deluxe edition even more. I usually avoid buying hardcovers but the deluxe edition is a work of art in itself and I had to have it.
My Favorite People’s favorite things.
I love the Celebrity Shopping lists on The Strategist and the “10 Essentials” videos on GQ’s YouTube channel. I think you can learn a lot about people based on their favorite things. This recurring segment highlights some of My Favorite People’s favorite things.
One of the best things about moving to the Bay Area is being closer to coworkers that have become friends. One of those friends is Zoe.
Zoe makes me feel cooler because I am friends with her. She is what I imagine to be the closest version of classic Hollywood glamour that naturally exists in 2025. She’s truly a vision and I love basking in her natural glow while we chat about reality television from Utah.
Our paths crossed professionally, but eventually the small seeds of friendship began to sprout. She is a fellow lover of the Reality Television Arts and Sciences and is my absolute favorite Cal alum from San Diego. Sorry, Samin.
My favorite memory of us is a flight we shared during a work trip from America’s Finest City. She spilled proverbial tea so hot that I actually screamed, “GET ME OFF THIS PLANE!!” After I immediately apologized to everyone around me, I laughed for the rest of the flight.
She told me once that “you always have to do one thing for yourself” and I think about that when start to let this newsletter slide away. Writing this is just for me (though I love everyone that reads it) and am so thankful she gave me that token of wisdom.
She’s a real one.
The professional path that brought us together has reached its end for now, but I’m so glad I have a full of garden of friendship to continue to cultivate.
Now please enjoy Zoe’s favorite things in her own words:
Chowder: Not to be confused with the soup, Chowder is my soulcat. About a year ago, I spontaneously signed up to foster a cat through the local humane society. Months went by without a word, and I’d nearly forgotten about it when one day they called to ask if I was still interested. They told me they had an adult tuxedo cat who needed a new home because he was playing too aggressively with his former foster’s children. Let’s just say I was not prepared to meet the cuddliest, clingiest, spunkiest, most talkative cat ever. Everyone who meets Chowder falls in love with him, including me, so when the humane society called earlier this year to say another family was interested in adopting him, I immediately pulled the trigger and made him mine forever.
Reality TV: To some, reality television is “trashy.” To me, it’s sociological research. At any given time, I’m probably waiting for the next episode or season of one of my favorite shows: Love Island, Real Housewives (Salt Lake City, specifically), The Bachelor franchise, and my current fixation, The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. I don’t just watch reality TV, I analyze it. I study the patterns, examine group dynamics, and notice how it mirrors current societal trends. You know what they say: one man’s trash (TV) is another man’s treasure.
Hot Yoga: Walking into my first hot yoga class, I was naive. I thought I was in decent shape, I mean, it’s yoga, how hard could it be? Fast forward to halfway through class when I started seeing stars and had to step out to recover. After a quick pep talk, I went back in and finished. From that moment on, I was hooked. Now I take a yoga sculpt or hot pilates class at least once a week, and it has become my favorite workout. Give me a yoga mat, sweat towel, two-pound weights, and an instructor shouting encouragement, and I’m all set. I don’t know what we’re training for, but I know I’ll be ready when the day comes.
Themed Parties: Hosting is one of my love languages. In another life, I might have been an event planner and I’ve always loved a themed party. The costumes, the food, the activities, the more extra, the better. About two years ago, I started a family tradition of hosting a themed murder mystery party. Dressing up was mandatory, and I curated a menu to match the theme. The first year was Old Hollywood, followed by Western, then Masquerade. There’s no better feeling than scouring Pinterest for inspiration, designing themed invitations, and planning the perfect outfit.
Y2K: I was born in the wrong era *sigh*. What I would give to be strolling down Rodeo Drive in a velour Juicy tracksuit with a little dog in my purse. I’ve always been obsessed with the early 2000s—the fashion, the movies, the music, and the iconic celebrity culture. One of my comfort shows is The Girls Next Door, a reality series starring Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends Holly, Bridget, and Kendra at the Playboy Mansion. To me, they were the epitome of fabulous. The pink, bubblegum-pop aesthetic of the show is the exact aesthetic I aspire for my life.
Disneyland: Nostalgia is one of the most powerful feelings I experience. It can be overwhelming, but I love anything that brings me back to simpler times and reminds me of my inner child. One of those places is Disneyland. The sights, smells, and tastes immediately transport me back to being a kid and feeling the Disney magic. Disneyland is one of my family’s favorite things to do together. We currently have season passes, so you’ll often find us on a random weekday, park-hopping and indulging in classic Disney snacks.
Anything French: Oui, je suis une francophile. I’ve always been intrigued by all things French. While most of my classmates chose Spanish (the more practical option growing up in San Diego), I chose French. I always dreamed of visiting Paris and seeing the Eiffel Tower, La Seine, and the Arc de Triomphe in person. That dream nearly came true sophomore year of college when I signed up to study abroad with my best friend, but the pandemic canceled our plans. Finally, this spring, I got to visit Paris—and I fell in love. It felt like I had found my home, and even while I was there, I was already scheming how to move there one day.
Hockey Romance Books: I stumbled upon this genre by accident during an eight-hour drive from the Bay Area to San Diego. I needed an audiobook and picked one called Icebreaker. Once I got past the initial cringe, I was hooked. Since then, I’ve devoured around 15 hockey romance novels. They usually follow a familiar formula: a bad-boy hockey player meets an innocent, nerdy girl who tutors him while he helps her make her crush jealous. And honestly? I eat it up every time. I feel like a tween again, kicking my feet and giggling as I read. I recently found out that my favorite hockey romance series is being adapted into a TV show, and you better believe I’ll be tuning in.
Lemonade: My drink of choice. No matter where I go, if lemonade is on the menu, that’s what I’ll order. Bonus points if it’s flavored—strawberry, peach, dragonfruit, you name it. My mom calls me Buddy the Elf because I like my drinks sweet and saturated, and lemonade is no exception. I’ve even thought about starting a review account for different lemonades. For now, I’ll share my top picks: Chik-fil-A, Trader Joe’s, True Food Kitchen (peach lemonade), Simply Lemonade, and—oddly enough—a random lemonade stand I stumbled across at a fair in Ohio.
My Digital Camera: I’ve always loved taking photos. Back in middle school, when I first got an iPhone, I would make my friends do photoshoots while I played creative director. Last year, I received the best gift ever: my Canon G7X digital camera. I bring it everywhere, capturing memories and curating the perfect shots. Honestly, I think people have started inviting me to things just so I’ll bring my camera along. I love how I can be creative and help capture people in their best moments.